Don't Wait for a Semi to Hit You

My Recent Journey to a Life Reimagined

Yep, that’s me. Angled toward my good side and not my bruised side. Trying to look “fine.” I do feel like I’ve been hit by a truck.

I looked up at the officer who came to the hospital to take my statement and nodded, forcing a weak smile.

“I guess I should thank my annoying truck alarm for forcing me to wear a seatbelt,” I quipped, the words feeling hollow even as I said them.

We both looked at each other for a moment, a silent acknowledgment passing between us. He had my number, alright. My armor of humor and self-deprecation was as transparent as the hospital gown I wore.

The truth was, a cold dread coiled in the pit of my stomach. And not just because of the twisted metal and shattered glass that had filled my rearview mirror moments before.

No, this was deeper. A stark realization that the life I had been living was far from the one I wanted to create. I had already taken a few steps this year—my 2024 bingo card was already a chaotic mess—but the question that echoed in my mind was chilling: If I left the earth today, had I left the mark I wanted on the world?

The answer came swiftly, inescapably:

No.

And in the days since, as I wrote this, those words have haunted me…

“You are lucky to be here.”

“You are lucky to be here.”

“You are lucky to be here.”

I was lucky, wasn’t I? Lucky because life is fragile, a delicate dance of chance and circumstance. Lucky because I had walked (or rather, been wheeled) away from a seven-vehicle accident and a direct hit from a semi-truck. Lucky because, despite the injuries, we all walked or wheeled away.

But what did it all mean?

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Between the splitting headaches, growing neck and back pain, and the disorienting fog of cognitive issues that had begun to creep in, I still found myself with an unfortunately ample amount of time to ponder this question. 

Or perhaps "dwell" and "ruminate" are more accurate words than "ponder." It was inescapable, a relentless loop playing in the background of my healing.

I was supposed to be resting, damn it, recovering from the almost purely internal injuries I had sustained (because, of course, in the grand story of my life, I "just" had "internal trauma"). I was supposed to focus on healing—this wasn't the time to obsess over the life ahead.

Or was it?

Healing, I was discovering, is rarely a peaceful or comfortable experience.

But within the pain and discomfort, a space opened for introspection—a new opportunity to explore my life with fresh eyes.

A quote from the Bhagavad Gita came to me:

“Curving back within myself, I create again and again.”

When we feel stuck, when the world seems to close in around us, we have the opportunity for self-reflection. We have the power to shape how we experience our reality. And we always have the chance to forge a new path for ourselves.

We are offered an unlimited opportunity for creation, and we hold the keys to our destiny, however long or short that might be.

When hard things happen, "one must learn to tolerate them without being disturbed.” Authenticity will always be challenged in a society that prioritizes conformity over individuality.

And so, even amid the pain, discomfort, and personal unwillingness, I took time to do one of my favorite coaching activities: the self-eulogy.

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I remember the first time I proposed this tool to a client. It does have a morbid quality, and it can leave a lasting impression.

But it's also relatively simple.

Download the free .pdf version of the tool here:

If you were to leave this earth today, what eulogy would you give at your funeral?

Writing your eulogy can be an emotional experience, but it's worth it. It's a chance to step outside yourself and view your life with a compassionate and loving eye. It's essential to tap into your self-love and forgiveness truly. 

Imagine speaking about a dear friend who has passed—you wouldn't dwell on their flaws or shortcomings. You'd celebrate their life, accomplishments, and unique spirit. Offer yourself that same kindness and understanding as you write. Remember, this is a space for honoring your journey, not for harsh judgment or self-criticism.

Then, read your eulogy aloud to yourself.

• Which parts resonate with you? 

• What parts represent wins or "victories" to a younger version of yourself? 

• What comes forward that you aren't entirely proud of? 

• What is missing from your life? 

• Where might you have been unkind to yourself? 

• What is the character of the person that emerges from the words?

Allow yourself some time to reflect and process your self-eulogy.

Then, it's time to write the self-eulogy you wish you could give. This is your chance to dream without limits, to envision the most fulfilling and meaningful life imaginable. What passions have you always wanted to pursue? What impact do you long to have on the world? 

Let your imagination soar, unburdened by self-doubt or fear. Allow yourself to experience the joy and satisfaction of having accomplished your wildest dreams, of having lived a life that was truly aligned with your deepest values and aspirations. Write knowing that this life is not only possible but also waiting for you to claim it.

And then, when you are ready, take some time to reflect again:

• What is different about your ideal self-eulogy? 

• What accomplishment is the most exciting to you? 

• What change is required to make it a reality? 

• What challenges might you face along the way? 

• How does it feel to imagine your life in this way? 

• What is one small step you can take, today, to begin your journey anew?

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There is so much I want to do, explore, and experience. And who knows how much time I still have to accomplish it all?

Here are just a few highlights:

• I want to be a dad. This realization, which came to me late last year and early into this one, has already set off a cascade of changes in my life.

• I want to be quicker to kindness, not frustrated irritation.

• I want to create a space, a sanctuary, where people can explore their authentic selves without fear of judgment, reprisal, or the cruelty that sometimes accompanies that journey.

• I want to explore the depth of the smile and how each unique smile reflects an individual's story, triumphs, and challenges.

• I want to help people rediscover the strength of compassion and empathy, qualities that are forgotten in our fast-paced, self-centered world.

And lastly, I simply want to be better at honoring myself, at holding true to my own authenticity, even when it feels uncomfortable or inconvenient.

Because I am lucky to be here. Lucky to have been given this jarring reminder of life's precious fragility. Lucky to have the chance to re-evaluate, to course-correct, to rebuild.

And I am determined to make the most of this unexpected gift. To honor my life, not with empty words or fleeting resolutions, but with deliberate action and unwavering commitment.

I have a world to create. A legacy to build. A life to truly live.

What story will you write with your life?

Don't leave it up to chance that you'll still have an opportunity to write it. And don't wait for a semi-truck to slam into your reality, forcing you to re-evaluate everything. 

You can begin today, right now, creating your life, crafting the legacy you want to leave, and savoring the joy and fulfillment that comes from living each day in alignment with your truest self.

I am grateful for all of the love and support I have received. I am beyond words at the kindness and thoughtfulness I have experienced. Thank you.